“You’re gonna get it up the ass, no matter what you do.”

Yesterday we tried out the butt funnel.

It doesn’t work. It needs improvement.

It was fun though. Using my body orifices as Master’s toilet is just one of my hot buttons. It’s got nothing to do with the enema aspect, as we dabbled in enemas and found nothing erotic about them at all. It’s definitely the objectification process that’s hot. (That’s hot, says Paris.)

I was told that the funnel wouldn’t be long enough to pass the sphincter and that was true. It wasn’t. Plus, the funnel itself can’t be angled up (unless I could stand on my head, which I cannot). So! We pretty well knew we’d have to change the design, we just didn’t know how until we used it.

Here’s me waiting.

Here’s Master contemplating the angle.

Here’s the attempt. Now that pink looking stuff? We can only assume it’s the soap I used to lube up the end of the funnel (which actually wasn’t pink soap) or it’s just the way the light hit it. Master doesn’t generally pee in technicolor pink. And look, he peed all over his foot. (tee hee)

So! Here’s what we’re going to do. Master thinks the funnel should have a tube on it, a long one that enters the ass. That way he can move the funnel around without it pulling out of my butt. That gives him more maneuvering room, because he doesn’t think he should have to kneel behind me (*snicker*). Plus, gravity will work on pulling the urine down into my ass, and the longer tube will allow for it to be pushed in deeper, past the sphincters.

Should be easy enough to do.

They have a similar one at Extreme Restraints, but it ends in a butt plug which is not what we want. We want something that is easily and quickly slid in, used, and slid out. Much like the end of an enema hose I suppose. He is also able to piss in my ass simply by shoving his cock up my ass, but, like the butt plug, that takes too much fussing around. He has to be semi-erect at least, plus there needs to be lube involved, and I’m not so much with the *shoving* of anything in my ass. The purpose of the butt funnel is supposed to be quick, easy peasy lemon squeezy, Master has to pee, I bend over, it’s done. Ta-fucking-da, cunt.

I suppose if we ever get to the point where Master rarely needs to use the actual toilet to pee in, it’ll make cleaning the bathroom a lot easier for me. Men and their splashing! Sheesh.

~cunt