Invisible Title
The Background: Jes slipped on the ice the other day and wrenched a muscle in her thigh. She was sitting on the couch rubbing Icy Hot on it. I was doing dishes, lost in my own head.
Jes: Hey Mom?
Me: Hmm?
Jes: Remember when I was in softball and I pulled my groin muscle and I was putting Icy Hot on it and I rubbed some up a little too high? That burned so bad! Have you ever gotten Icy Hot up on your crotch?
Me: *laughing* Yeah, I have. Great big globs of it. It hurts!
Jes: *awkward silence*
Me: *Humming* *Still lost in my own world*
Jes: HOW did you get great big globs on there?
Me: *deer in headlights* Um… I…erm.. it… maybe…
Jes: *wrinkles her nose* You guys are weird.
So, like, she totally knows what we do. Not all of it, not (I don’t think) the M/s power exchange stuff. But she knows all about the s&m.
She’s really fine with it. She had a couple of questions, just some basic curiousity stuff. I’m okay with her knowing. I thought I would be all weirded out but I’m really not.
I have no particular reason for not posting much lately. I’ve been busy, I’m preoccupied with things, and blogging is usually the first thing I push back in favor of other things. The only problem with that is that I then have a hard time recapturing the mojo.
So while I’m recapturing, let’s do a meme! What fun!
The 7 Weird Facts Meme:
1. I have RLS. It’s hereditary. My mom had it, her mom had it, Am has it. I don’t think Jes has it. I remember the first time I saw the commercial for RLS, when it first was recognized as a syndrome, I jumped off the couch and screamed. I was stoked.
I don’t use any treatment for it, and I think I have a pretty mild case of it from what I hear. It only acts up when I’m tired, and almost always in my right leg. So I simply go to bed when it’s bugging me.
2. I can’t whistle. At all. I’ve had numerous people try and teach me, but all I do is blow hot air (haha!)
3. I used to vomit if a guy came in my mouth. I could not get over the idea that that stuff MOVES. It’s ALIVE.
Now, I’m a damn sperm guzzler. The only thing that changed was mind over matter. I just decided one day that I was going to swallow and that’s that. I did, and I’ve been swallowing ever since. (Though I still think about it moving.)
4. Though my feet are typically so cold they hurt, I cannot stand to have them covered when I’m in bed. No socks, and I have to be able to poke them out from under the blankets at random times or else they feel like they are on fire.
I also cannot go barefoot, ever. That hurts. But I also can’t just wear socks because once I can feel things on the bottom of my socks, I’ll have to change them into a clean pair. But I can’t wear socks and shoes in the house because I have to be able to poke my feet out into the air or they start burning. So I have to wear slippers. Simple, ugly, non-sexy, slip-on slippers.
5. I’m addicted to chapstick. I have tubes all over the house and in my pockets, my purse, my car. I refuse to go to the Lip Balm Addicts Anonymous website though. They’ll make me quit and I’ll die!
6. Watching those videos where people fall off skateboards/flip their bikes/anything of the painful sort of falling makes me queasy. Non-consensual pain or something. I generally turn my head or cover my eyes.
7. I can’t smash a bug. I can’t step on it or swat it or squish it in any way. The very idea of it exploding under my foot/hand gives me the willies. I picture, in graphic detail, the process of its skin/shell/whatever squeezing and then rupturing and the guts bursting out and it just makes me wanna puke. I can pick them up with a tissue, but only if I don’t have to hold it tight enough that it’ll pop, and flush it down the toilet. And I can spray a bug with Raid, but I can’t watch it as it convulses from the poision because I feel bad.
I’m supposed to tag peeps so if you’ve read this far, consider yourself tagged. Tell me the weird things about you so I can snicker behind your back get to know you better!
Uncategorized | kaya | 
Sunday January 31st, 2010 1:16am
Haha, you’re a funny girl with your non-barefoot thing going on…what about at the beach (paddling in the ocean etc)??? Although i HAVE to agree about when things get stuck to the bottom of your socks – sooooo irritating!
About the video thing – I actually fainted watching a YouTube video of a dude breaking his leg falling off a motorcycle *blushes* (actually i ALMOST fainted when I watched The Boob-Nailing Movie too *blushes deeper shade of crimson*)
Can’t think of any weirdnesses to add, except maybe that the mere THOUGHT of certain smells can make me dry retch.
That’s all I got right now.
Btw, did Jes ask The Questions today all in one hit, or just dribs and drabs over time?
Sorry, nosy bitch here! Heh.
OK…I shall never think of sperm the same way again. Never once in my life did I stop and think “Hey, that stuff’s alive!” Ick.
And, I shall also never think of squishing a bug the same way. I hate bugs..I typically squish with relish (unless they’re big f’ers…theeen, it creeps me out big time). But now, the thought of them exploding like that? Ew!!
I always (and I mean ALWAYS) picture the little spermies swimming BETWEEN my teeth… and I’ll admit it freaks me right the hell out.
~Chloe
[rq=2015462,0,blog][/rq]Very Deep Thinking
haha OMG .. the entire sperms being älive” thing freaks me out …
and i thought i was weird.
Another weirrd thing is: i dislike ppl dusting thier whatever near me when i am eating. I swwwear i can see dust flying into my food. It travels … oh yea the same for sneezes only i cant see it but can feel it (paronoid??? .. nooo way))
snicker snicker
ooops i mean .. know i know you better
morningstar (owned by Warren)
[rq=2015776,0,blog][/rq]TA !! DA!!
ughhh i should NOT try and leave cheeky comments when my eyes are barely open and the brain is in neutral – i make typos !!! the above comment should have said
“NOW i know” not KNOW I KNOW
geeeeeez
[rq=2015776,0,blog][/rq]TA !! DA!!
OMG, i’d never thought of bugs exploding when you squish them, even though i dont squish them, i’d rather just gently shoo them out the window or the door or something, or drown ‘em…. but….. damn, i’m never gonna get that image outta my head now…. and sperm being alive?? Kk, i think i shall stop thinking about these things now before i gross myself out!
[rq=2015924,0,blog][/rq]Getting Geeked Out!
You never fail to make me laugh, or at least get so tickled that I blow coffee out of my nose when I read some shit you’ve done!(That might have been TMI about my nasal habits, huh?)
As for your daughter knowing some of what you do…hon, I am right there with you lately it seems. Although our kids are all “grown and gone” (I love that expression), it seems that only last month, while I was in Kuwait with Sir, I was informed by our oldest daughter that she “accidentally” (whatever the heck that means) found my blog and had been reading it. Don’t know how she found it since I’ve never mentioned ThePinkPoppet to her and she lives several states away and doesn’t see things at our house…we visit them. Now if my blog was just all fictional erotica, not a problem, but it has pictures….of US, in real life, doing STUFF! I almost lost my Cheerios when she emailed me and told me that she knew what me and her dad had been up to and do and as she says, “THAT lifestyle you two SEEM to lead”. OMG! Shoot me now! The Capn (my hubby, her dad) says to let it “roll off me like water off a ducks back”. My reply-”WHAT?ARE YOU NUTS? Our daughter knows!” The really difficult part is that when I flew back to the U.S., I was picked up by HER and spent the next 2 days at HER house with HER husband and kids. The subject never came up, thankfully, but I had to wonder if she had mentioned or shared that info with her hubby since he was sometimes looking at me in a strange way, and I’d get the old deer-in-the-headlights thing going. Of course, that might have just been my imagination. But if she did show him my blog…YUCK! If that isn’t enough, I have gotten several hits just after that from the same place our son lives and the IP address is his. Blabber mouth daughter can’t keep anything to herself! Tee-hee. But I still love her to pieces. He hasn’t said anything, but again…YUCK! So now it seems we have been outed to two of our three kiddos. At least these two are the cool kids and pretty much remember how we raised them to live and let live and accept people for what they are even if you don’t necessarily agree. Thank goodness the other kid hasn’t found out…yet. She’d be a basket case of moral high-ground and I just don’t need preachy right now. So hon, welcome to the party and the group…mommies with grown kids who know you are a perv! Big hugs! Tee-hee-hee.
[rq=2016108,0,blog][/rq]The Kink Club Dinner
I am the exact same with 2 and 4. So glad I have some nice weird company.
[rq=2017178,0,blog][/rq]First Post
It’s okay, Master and I not only know the details of his mom’s goings on, but we’re acquainted with her twitter, and her blog, as well as we’re business partners of a sort. Ffff.
My parents know what I’m up to. Or rather, my mom knows what she’s up to and that seems to be pretty accurate for our family.
D: I’m with you on falling. I HATE seeing other people fall and it REALLY freaks me out. Not as badly as when I fall, though. I have good reflexes, but it feels like I’m falling FOREVER and oh god what if I land on my KNEES I won’t be able to survive the pain will they break or will I just pass out OH IT’S FINE, I CAUGHT MYSELF. (ta-dah! fuck you ice)
don’t you just hate it when you are caught? i mean really HOW did you get icy hot THERE mom? yea that one gave me a good laugh…sorry, but remember i am laughing with you, not at you.
7 things?
1. i am a selective swallower…yes i know that sounds terrible..and probably need therapy for that.
2. personal and professional lives are kept as separate as possible.
3. i too will not step/squash certain bugs, namely those that are crunchy…yikes..that sounds….big willies.
4. avid reader, confess to a love of trashy romance novels…i have them stashed under the “respectable” books.
5. political junkie, highly opinionated, stubborn, passionate, particularly about health care, living outside the US for that very reason, health care coverage. Mad at the democrats, majority and can’t managed to wipe their own asses, mad at the republicans who just say no to EVERYTHING
6. i am falling in love with a man i have never met via the internet, thank God for Skype, yes i probably need therapy.
7. older men really makes me wild…spank me daddy….lol
here’s two bonus facts
8. i sleep with the tv on
9. i have a feral cat who had adopted me
re: spitting and swallowing — I’ve never understood the spitters, because swallowing is the fastest and most efficacious way of getting come out of your mouth! If you want to spit, you have to find somewhere to spit it, thus keeping the lil wrigglers in your mouth for seconds longer! (Not that I generally mind ejaculate that much.)
re: feet — mine are always cold at home. I live in super soft warm comfy socks. But when wearing shoes, I have to have lighter socks, or I am miserable.
re: I am also addicted to chapstick and so is my sister and pretty much all of my friends. You are not alone, and Lip Balm Appreciation is NOT an addiction, it is a mark of good taste and sense!
re: “those videos where people fall off skateboards” — I’d always rather watch sex than violence. And most decidedly I’d rather watch sex than stupidity!
I squashed a bug the other day and it actually squealed. I felt terrible and haven’t been able to kill anything bug-like since.
Sperm also makes me want to throw up in my mouth a little.
[rq=2022269,0,blog][/rq]Is that a mango in your cunt or are you just happy to see me?
It’s always nice to know that you are not the only person with..um…different ways of seeing things.
[rq=2025422,0,blog][/rq]White flag
Oh – i forgot to tell you that i completely agree with the whole ‘unable to squash bugs’ thing. Especially beetles or anything with a hard shell.
*creepy-crawly-shivers*
[rq=2025422,0,blog][/rq]White flag
Kaya,
Ooo, a meme. Cool beans. But first; so Jes has discovered her mom’s kinky, and the world continues to spin away normally. I always knew you raised sensible kids. Now, for seven weird facts about the Dave
1: I have gout, a condition where your blood decides at random times to precipitate uric acid into your joints. What does that feel like? Imagine pouring a pound of rock salt into your ankle and then walk on it for a couple of weeks. The first time it happened, I thought I’d broken my ankle while I was asleep.
2: When I was a kid (and to some extent even now), I try to make sure I step over an even number of yellow lines in sidewalks and streets, as well as a multiple of four white lines.
3: I seem to suffer a very weird form of ED. I can’t stay erect if there’s anything lubing it. No idea why.
4: I’ve been successfully registered to teach in the state of Vioctoria in Australia. All I need now is a job there.
5: Most of my erotica was written while still a virgin; yet it still gets rave reviews for the most part.
6: I’m afraid of (phobic really) of bees and other flying stinger bugs. On the other hand, I like spiders. They keep the fly population down.
7: I don’t find the taste of my own semen repulsive and even have fantasies about cream pies. Of course, I’ll have to solve #3 before this becomes likely.
So, am I too weiord for you?
Dave
Over the weekend one of my 14 yr olds informed me that the last time she had a friend over they could hear smacking noises coming from my room. She told her friend, “T is just spanking my momma again”.
My deep blush gave no credence to my “it is not what you think” explanation.
Lets see…7 weird things.
1. I am addicted to socks. I wear them all the time. I have all different kinds. Even in summer I walk around, inside, in socks always.
2. I hate romance novels. They make me want to hurl. I also hate reality TV. American Idol makes me want to poke my eyes out.
3. I cant sleep without panties. I have tried and I just lay there awake thinking of all the bugs the rest of you can’t kill, crawling into my crotch.
4. I love enemas. Not the cleaning out part but the warm full feeling I get makes me instantly and incredibly submissive.
5. I am an accountant and I listen to rap music. Especially when I am stressed, nothing better than some old-school, hard core, gangsta rap. I also listen to everything from Chopin to Kid Rock and lots of country.
6. I love pee. Master is not keen on the idea of peeing in my mouth but I wish he would! I want it on me and in me.
7. I to am a chapstickaholic. OMG, you can never have enough tubes of it.
exploding under my feet…ewwwwwwww!
i don’t squish either (too gross and now i have graphic reasons as to why and don’t have to say because you said it all. maybe more than all. (nilla shudders)
and i don’t do chapstick…i’m a burts bees girl. but i’m with you on tubes everywhere!
[rq=2028545,0,blog][/rq]Nasty
I chuckled at the conversation you had with Jes about Icy Hot. It’s nice that you two can talk about that stuff. While my mom knows I do bdsm, I don’t go into detail. She’s a prude
I cringe if I see someone hurt themselves, but I avert my eyes if there’s extreme gore and blood. Blood makes me queasy
As for chapsticks, have you ever tried Burt’s Bees lip balm? I love it! It’s probably the one chapstick I’ve used religiously compare to ones I’ve had in the past. I’m going to get more when I’m back home in March
Weird facts….
1. I like to rubs my fingers on blankets that have silken ends. It’s been a habit of mine since I was a toddler.
2. I can’t snap my fingers.
3. I don’t have any piercings or tattoos on my body. Nor do I want them. I like the way my body is (although I like to point out that I don’t have problems with other people getting pierced and tat…it’s just not my thing).
4. THis ties in with the tid bit above, but I won’t put a needle in my body unless it’s benefical for my health and I see it as fit for my health.
5. Burned buildings and vehicles scare the shit out of me.
6. THe Exorcist creeps the shit out of me, and it’s probably the only movie I almost walked out on.
7. Socializing in large crowds makes me uncomfortable, but I have no problem whatsoever performing in front of them.
[rq=2028610,0,blog][/rq]Welcome to my Journal!
Killing bugs is horrible. I can’t handle it, especially if they’re gross.
[rq=2038123,0,blog][/rq]Stealing Kaya’s Seven Random Facts Meme
Well, this was an interesting post to return to
HEY BABE! I’ve returned, kinda, to the blogging world and have months of reading to do. Did i miss anything major? How’s the grandbaby? How are you!!!
Oh, and i might just be one of those overly demented people who sperm in my mouth, dripping down my throat, in between my teeth doesn’t bother. Now piss on the other hand…
missed reading you and looking forward to catching up!
xoxx
toy
[rq=2039947,0,blog][/rq]a long overdue hello
I too have the feet thing going on. I don’t like diet coke or regular so I always ask for half and half whenever we go out, I cannot bear to eat any meat that is not we’ll, well done, I have to wear my seat belt with the chest strap behind my seat or else it feels like my nipples are being slowly sawed off.