Comments on: Follow The Leader

By: french

french — Sat, 28 Nov 2009 11:01:51 +0000

A slippery slope with jagged rocks at the bottom strikes me as a good way to describe any romantic and/or sexual relationship.

By: doubleknot

doubleknot — Fri, 27 Nov 2009 15:17:04 +0000

I don’t have the expectation that I will simply be a passive participant in our grand M/s relationship waiting for him to initiate whatever his heart desires. Much the opposite, in fact. And if I am being too proactive or forward, you can bet he will let me know in no short order.

It is possible to overthink this stuff. (Which incidentally, he tells me I am guilty of on a semi-regular basis lol)
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By: doll

doll — Wed, 25 Nov 2009 09:34:13 +0000

I think that it is important to retain a certain orneriness as a sub so that the dom is never 100% relaxed. I certainly wouldn’t want routine to step in and boredom follow.

By: Nina

Nina — Sun, 22 Nov 2009 21:13:55 +0000

D: You must be exhausting your subby!

Gah…

I think yes, this are very serious and normal isssues that happen, not only in the lifestyle but even in marriage… o__o

fukin’ wierd
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By: Garden Fence

Garden Fence — Sun, 22 Nov 2009 04:49:20 +0000

I don’t think these issues are necessarily unique to the lifestyle, either.

By: TakenbyLovely

TakenbyLovely — Sun, 22 Nov 2009 04:18:33 +0000

It’s probably very selfish, but I try to be proactive in things that are smaller, more routine. Instead of waiting for him to tell me something that is *relatively* routine, I just do it…because I can handle the disappointment if he didn’t need/want it. Big things, big scenes and such? I totally lay those in his lap, because big stuff = big expectations for myself. I can’t help it. And I don’t handle feeling like a failure well.

My biggest fear, in all of this, is that I will cease to matter. Sometimes I feel like I don’t anyway – that he only cares about what he can get FROM me or what he can pull OUT of me, not about me as a person. That’s not necessarily the truth, but some days it feels like that.

I think Anony’s comment that you ‘must be exhausting’ was really shitty, because different folks like different strokes and all. I know my own daddy gets bored if I don’t keep him on his toes a bit!
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By: DaddySin

DaddySin — Sun, 22 Nov 2009 04:09:56 +0000

Oops that was me

By: kaya

kaya — Sat, 21 Nov 2009 16:10:12 +0000

“First and foremost D/s or M/s is a relationship and relationships require compatability and compromise even if it does seem at odds with the idea of the “twue” dynamic”

Exactly.

By: kaya

kaya — Sat, 21 Nov 2009 16:09:35 +0000

Me too. Maybe it’s just human nature.

By: kaya

kaya — Sat, 21 Nov 2009 16:09:10 +0000

Okay! I hope to see them.