Blurred Lines
It’s been a couple of blucky days.
The other day, Master told me I was getting a bit too critical toward him. I’m treating him like a husband, and expecting from him the behaviors and mannerisms of a husband.
Husband and wife is a title, a formality for practical purposes. It makes certain legal/financial matters easier.
But it makes other things harder.
I’ve let husband and wife and all it encompasses replace Master and slave.
I’ve got a lot to think about.
I might take a couple of days, if he grants me permission that is, and try and find my focus. Back off of things that are distracting me.
Y’all behave (better than I am anyway).
~cunt
Tags: M/s rambles, realizations
Uncategorized | kaya | 
Sunday April 26th, 2009 1:06pm
Maybe you should focus on being as much of a 50′s housewife as you can be?
‘Cause..The roles aren’t that different if that’s the case. Your husband was still allowed to punish you then, and everything. Maybe if you adopted that as your mindset for a week it would help you ease into it again?
This’ll probably sound moronic, but that’s never stopped me before…
My first thought reading this was: “I have the feeling you don’t have as much to think about as you think you do.”
You’ve been a good slave before, and you’ll be a good one again. You’ve lost your focus a little, but I doubt it’s wandered too far. You’ve fallen into an unconscious pattern of treating your Master too much like a vanilla husband, and he brought it to your consciousness.
The fact that you care so much about what he said and how you’ve acted and treated him – care enough to think you have a lot to think about and need to take days off in order to do it? That sounds to me like a whole lot of you CARES about the errors you’ve made, and you’ve got all the devotion and dedication and desire needed to fix it. And then some.
I’m not worried. Don’t you be, either.
Unless The Boss says to be worried, of course. :D
Obviously, don’t be blase, but… Eh, you know what? You don’t need to hear this – I KNOW you’ve got it covered. :)
~Chloe
Sorry, baby. Hang in there. Hope you get to feeling better – know you’ll get things the way you want them to be.
You have the right mindset. Seems like you are a little humbled and maybe remorseful too for slipping into the pattern. Don’t beat yourself up too much, just learn and grow.
We’ll be here for you when you need us. Hang in there!
~big hugs from junebug~
Hang in there.
It seems to me that when the decision was made to bring you back up to a more ‘nilla mindset so that you could function, this side effect may not have been considered. Not to mention that over the last few months, there has been so much turmoil and lack of time to be anything except a nice ‘nilla couple.. Naturally those behaviours are going to come out.
The week that you spent together again, going back to what you both want and desire, has shown you both what path you want to walk.
You’ll get there again. It takes two to let a slave slip, who has been as deeply into her world as you have. It will take two to take you back there again.
Hope you get your head on straight soon. Hugs n stuff.
All I can say is, it must be in the midwest water. Granted, we’re not husband and wife, but I’ve been doing the vanilla b/f g/f thing to him lately and … it’ll prolly be on my blog later on today. :(
Just because your M said you are a bit critical towards him doesn’t mean your failing as a submissive and treating him like a husband.
you can be both wife and submissive and he can be master and husband.
snipping critical remarks isn’t the right thing to do for any relationship.
having a discussion that discusses some critical things that are important to discuss in a mature manner are NORMAL things to do in a relationship.
it is probably not what you said but how you said it.
Is he still working a lot? I had the thought that I tend to get too big for my britches when he’s out of the house a lot. Wasn’t it an issue to be ‘big, strong, independent household runner’ when he was living out of town before? When Daddy’s working insane hours and I’m left to my own devices I don’t jump to service when he’s around, I get pissed off that he’s not only interrupting my routine but that he’s addin to it.
I know, not very slavely, is it?
Best of luck getting back to where you need to be. *Big hugs*
Ye-e-ah. Been there, done that. Frequently.
I’d rather be humiliated and slapped around than told to my face I’m screwing up. I’d rather just have him beat me than listen to him express his disappointment in me. :(
You’ll get back to where you need to be. It wasn’t that long ago that you both came to a screeching halt; you’re still making your way back. Just another step in the right direction! :)
I agree that it’s probably normal correction. But I know what you mean about the husband-wife relationship being secondary to the other one. I am upset that I broke up with my boyfriend, but I’m super-devastated that I lost my Master.