All Dogs Go To Heaven
I knew it would be hard. I just didn’t expect it to be this hard.
It was time, hell, it had probably been time for awhile now. But when we’d decide it was time, when he would fall and have to lay there for a bit to gather the strength to stand, when he’d practically lick his fur off in an effort to get at the pain and we’d look sadly at each other and nod and say “It’s time.” – then he’d have a good day and chase the ball or do something cute and we’d think, oh, just a little while longer yet.
A little while longer for us.
Over this last weekend though, we couldn’t keep telling ourselves to wait a little bit more. We woke to find Sutter in the hallway, lying in a pile of his own excrement, unable to move out of it. Anyone who has had a dog will know what I mean when I say that he looked embarrassed and ashamed.
Master had to carry him outside, I cleaned up the mess- and we started saying our goodbyes to him then. It was time.
But, oh man, the guilt. He gets so excited when he sees the leash. Even more excited when he gets to go in the car. “Wanna go for a walk?! Wanna go bye-bye?!” and he’d chuff at you, smile all the way to his ears, prance in place– and where do we take him?
I just can’t shake the feeling that he felt betrayed, that he wasn’t ready at all- that we were.
That feeling isn’t helped by the fact that it took 3 times the dose of what it should have taken, the final dose injected straight into his heart while the vet petted him and remarked that he had the strongest heart of any dog she’d ever met.
And I stood there, his head in my hands, crying, second-guessing the decision, a decision that was just too late to change. I stayed until the end, hard as it was. There was just no way I was going to let him go alone.
Master was a mess. He couldn’t get out of the car, he tried- he couldn’t. He’s had that dog longer than he’s had me, longer than he’s had anything I guess. Longer than most relationships between people last. Sutter was the child he never had. He didn’t want his last memory to be watching the injection. I don’t blame him for that, not at all, and difficult as it was for me, animal lover that I am, I consider this to have been one of the deepest and most sincere services I could provide for him.
After, when it was over, we sobbed together in the car. I cried because he cried, because he loves so hard, and strong as he is, tough as he is, mean old sadistic bastard that he is- the loss of a plain old dog, HIS dog, crippled him. He sobbed, heart-broken and lost–
It was very humbling for me. It’s not often that I see him so vulnerable, so laid-open and raw. It’s not often that I’m in the role of the comforter. I caught a glimpse of how deeply he loves, and it touched me.
He’s not made of stone after all.
I love him all the more today knowing that.
LikeTags: reflection, sad
Uncategorized | kaya | 
Wednesday March 25th, 2009 6:53am
I am crying reading this. You did the right thing; please, please don’t second guess yourselves, please. We just had our family dog put down a few months ago too; she was 17. She has been living with our son since she was really his dog these last few years he’s been on his own but she was a member of our family since he got her for his birthday when he turned 10.
It always hurts to watch but we all went, my son, his wife, Dan and I to be with her, even though it’s hard. Our vet, too, had to try several times and it was terribly painful for us all to watch. But it needed to be done, she past the point of being able to enjoy life and old and we had to be there for her.
You gave her one last gift, not dragging her life out in pain and suffering, you know. It’s the last nice thing we can do for them, but it’s a very hard thing to do for us humans, very hard. They are almost like our children and now I’m crying again.
I’m sorry for your loss; I’m glad you are there for each other. You absolutely did the right thing, never ever doubt that. {{{{{{hugs}}}}}
i too cried as i read this. remembering all those pets that have gone on before us. how much they are loved, that they’ll be waiting on the other side for us with their favorite toy, excited and ready to play when they see us again.
my condolences & hugs,
elle
Please know that you did the right thing–you might have been able to wait, but it would have just been a matter of days. You picked the moment that you and the doggie were “strong” enough and brave enough, and that was good enough.
I know you will feel guilty, but imagine how difficult a more painful but “natural” death would have been for him and you will know you did your best.
Many hugs for a long, long time to comfort both of you.
I’m not a traditionally religious person, but the one thing I do know is that somehow, someway, in whatever manner it takes place, I will be reunited with my doggie and all of the pets I have had the privilege to go through earth’s life with. They have taught me about everything I ever needed to know, but especially that I have an endless capacity to love.
Thank you for being there for your animals. In addition to one for being parents to humans, it is the highest compliment.
omg, I almost cried… Kaya, this is so sad! I told you before I think, that a couple of years ago we had to put down two dogs and one of our cats. I vowed off getting any more pets. It was just too damn hard.
But seeing Scott’s vulnerable side, that must’ve been equally as hard, and yet touching.
That looks like a black lab. We’d had a lab-retriever that had a reddish color coat. They are the best dogs. I’m sorry for your loss.
My heart goes out to you and your family. Take the time to grieve just as you would any other member of your family for our pets are just that….members of our family.
Condolences,
Luci
~Hugs~ Again I’m sorry for the loss of your family member.
Thank you all so much. This really sucks. :-(
Oh God, this turned me into such a mess.
I know I can’t convince you that you did the right thing, but at least know that I think you did – and I’m a TOUGH one to convince that euthanasia is the right course. I argued long and hard with a parent over not euthanizing a cat once. I ended up winning the argument, and kitty was allowed to stay home a few more days. During which time, she got to die in a way that made her feel like she was doing her little pride proud. I try to think of animals as little foreigners – humans, just unable to speak English. And… If I knew a human in that much constant pain, and defecating on himself? If he gave me signs that he was tired of the pain, that his quality of life was dwindling too dim… I like to think I’d have the strength to help him move on, and end the pain, embarrassment, and suffering.
I don’t know if I would have that strength, mind. I’m the type who will try every last thing I can to let an animal die at home – and while 95% of that is about the animal, 5% of it is selfish. And I think what you did showed remarkable strength.
I’m so sorry you had to go through it, though. Please pass my sympathy on to Scott, too. I think that burden is the price you pay for being a good pet owner – for shouldering Sutter’s burdens as your own. It ain’t easy, but it’s worth it.
Forgive typos, I cried the whole way through this. :\
~Chloe
I am so sorry for your loss. But, like the others, I believe you made the right choice. I’ve been there and I know how hard it is to make that choice. And when pets are members of the family, it makes it an even more difficult choice. But it is also about their quality of life. You have to be the one to stick up for them – and you did. Bravo to you for making the tough choice and the one that is best for your dog.
Right now, the pain and heartbreak is overwhelming. But in time the wonderful memories will come back … and you will have those memories to hold on to.
De-lurking to say that I had to have a cat put down a few years ago – a kitten, really. He was only 8 months old. It was really really hard. He had FIP and I was told I could possibly extend his lifespan by a month, but it wouldn’t a good month for him. We put him down that day, and I don’t regret it. It still hurts, but I know I did the right thing. He was able to get lots of hugs and kisses and love, watch the fish swimming in the vet’s fish tank, and then go before there was any severe pain.
I really think you did the right thing, as much as it hurts.
I am de-lurking like others to say that my thoughts are with you. You did indeed do the right thing, although that hardly makes it easier. It’s an agreement we make silently every time we bring a new animal into our homes. To return the unconditional love that they offer by loving them back, protecting them as they do us, and by caring for them when they cannot care for themselves. You didn’t betray Sutter’s trust. You confirmed that you were worthy of it.
“You didn’t betray Sutter’s trust. You confirmed that you were worthy of it.”
You’ve no idea how badly I needed to hear that right now. Thank you so much.
just hugs you
*hugs*
i am so sorry for your loss. i wish there were words to make it better, but i know there aren’t. i’m thinking of you both and wishing you peace.
My heart is breaking for your family. Losing a pet is never easy – I might be a little cavelier about it because of all the ferret losses, but each one hurts.
Euthanasia is one of the kindest things you can do for an animal – you take their pain and you make it your own. How many times have we wished we could do that for a sick child or hurting friend? You two managed that for Sutter.
He’s not in any more pain. Ever again. If he could, he’d thank you for that.
*Tight hugs and much love to both of you*
I am so sorry for your Master and your loss. Pets are always part of ones family and be truly cherished. I echo what others said that you made the right choice and Sutter will still be loved in the wonderful memories you and your Master have of him.
Lin
Kaya,
My eyes teared as I read this. My “cause” is animal rescue so, I have lost more than a few “4 legged” children and some of the time it was necessary for me to make the decision. All you can do is go with your gut- and try to remember that it is a fortunate thing that we are able to help our best friends go when the time is here. I firmly believe in the “rainbow bridge” (you could probably google rainbow bridge to find the copy), so it really is just a temporary separation, we will see them again. I am so glad you stayed by his side, I know it was hard.
I am so sorry for your loss. It is hard when you have to let a pet go.
I don’t know if this will help at all http://www.petloss.com/poems/maingrp/rainbowb.htm
This brought tears to my eyes. I’m always amazed at how fiercely one can love a pet. I’ve not yet had to go through this, but am not looking forward to it. My sympathy to you and your family.
God, that sucks.
I’ve been there too many times. Mostly spending money I didn’t have trying to do whatever I could for them. I don’t think you can compare the loss of a pet to any other loss. It’s has it’s own particular flavor of pain, probably because they are so trusting and love unconditionally.
What has helped me, is writing down my pet’s story, from the time I got them, to the time they left me when it’s fresh in my memory. There are pet grief websites out there that have helped me also.
You did the right thing by him and gave him a wonderful, loving, safe home.
I’m sorry. For what it’s worth, I know how hard it is. It might sound odd, but I knew it was time for us to put down one of my cats when she let me pick her up and put her in the box and she did nothing but watch me. Walking away from that without bleeding convinced me, because she was a vicious little thing, and I loved her. You did the right thing.
I know that he knows it. They always do.
I’m so sorry for your loss. *hugs*
kaya,
I am really sorry for you and your family to lose your pet. A pet is just like having a child and the pain can be a lot. I am so sorry for your loss. *big hugs*
padme
Well now that we’re all a sobbing mess…
Much love to you, S and the kids. Huge, annoying amounts of love. You did the right thing, sweetheart.
xoxo
Oh I started crying as soon as I read the first words >.< I’m such a baby- but I’m also a dog rescue worker ( http://www.mistycreekdogrescue.com/dogs.php ) and I can feel for you and your Master. The decision to let go of a dog, or any pet for that matter, it a difficult one- one those of us in animal rescue have to deal with every day. The second guessing never goes away, but be assured you made the right choice (well it does for each dog, but as soon as the next time comes around you wonder if you made the right decision again). You were very brave, I have never been able to go in with a dog that has had to be put down. I cry back at the shelter- I wont even go to the vet. *wimpy wimpy wimpy*
Sutter is waiting on the other side of the Rainbow Bridge, but I’ll ask my lost dogs to keep him company while he waits for his Master. You both have my sympathy and will be in my thoughts.
Some people make donations to local animal shelters in their pets name- sponsering a kennel etc. I did when I lost my first dog (Mikey the cocker spaniel) and it seemed to help with the grief.
Thank you all so much. As much as your words mean to me, they’ll mean even more to Master when he reads them. And for that, because you are helping me to help him, I am seriously in love with you all.
I can only say how very sorry I am for you all. Losing a pet is one of the hardest things you ever have to do. Deciding to end their suffering even harder. Sir lost his dog (only 3 years old) not long after we met. I bawled for him and his family then as I do for you now. If there is anything I can do for you and your family please don’t be afraid to call.
Sending you all huge hugs and love.
Oh hun-
I cried too, and your dog looks like mine that we had to put down. You did the right thing by being there for him while he passed on. Please do not feel guilty- he only felt as if he was falling asleep and you were right there with him. The loss of a dog is terrible, and I deeply feel you’re pain. There aren’t any words right now that can help, but my thoughts are with you.
Lots of hugs and love to you guys, and he is a beautiful dog.
Holly
Dear Kaya,
You did the right thing.
It didn’t feel that way when I had to put down a pair of Corgis within two months of eachother (brother and sister) and I’m crying now for your pain and the memory of my own.
At least you were there.
My vet wouldn’t allow me in the room and I had to hear the yelping of my little dogs as they were taken from me.
Best Wishes,
Ally
i know nothing can really assuage the grief you’re all feeling – but i want you to know my heart goes out to you. i think Lisa said it best – but you did your best for Sutter, and i’m sure he was thankful for it.
Whatever the afterlife is, our four legged friends deserve the best of it.
He looked like he was a great and loyal companion. :)
Wherever he is now, you can bet he’s got a new stuffy toy and all the treats he can handle.
You did good.
~magpie
I’m sorry.
For animals, I think thinking about heaven is the best thing to do. Lots of things to chase, food bowl eternally filled with all the food that people get to eat, and as many walks as he wants – and no more of the suffering that he was going through before he died.
You did the right thing, even though it was hard.
When my dogs time came I remember just praying that I wouldn’t have to make this choice but was prepared to make it if I had too. When she was at the vets I spent as much time there as they would let me and it was very hard. But she wasn’t in pain so my vet thought the best thing to do was let her go naturaly. When she did pass away it took me a long time to stop crying because it is losing a member of the family. You made the right choice and it might not seem like it right now but he is in a better place. Hugs to you both.
All the tears in the world seem to be in this thread. So sorry for you and your family.
“Grief is the price we pay for love.”
Best wishes.
This was a heartbreaking, tearful read this morning. Sending love and prayers to you and your family…
Radha
You and your Master are lucky to have each other. Dogs… they have this way of holding long passed their time, for our sakes. I had to put down my dog a few years ago, shortly after my best friend died suddenly and unexpectedly. I waited longer than I should have, really. It was selfish. One of the bravest and best things you can do as a pet owner is let them go when they still have some dignity, and some spark left in them. You did him a kindness by not waiting until everything had gone from him, or been taken. You did the hard thing, the right thing, the loving thing. Big hugs to you guys.
I doubt much that I can say will make your and Scott’s pain any less today. Time helps some.
Dogs in particular love without any strings attached. It is as pure as it can be and so is their trust. The most apt thing written here was by Lisa earlier. I paraphrase and add my agreement that you confirmed that you were worthy of Sutter’s trust. I’d want the same compassion from my loved ones, wouldn’t you?
I’m sorry for your loss and shed a tear or two in Sutter’s honor. I think he was worth it. (but don’t tell the perfect slaves on Fetlife about that ’cause I’d certainly lose my Master appellation due to displayed weakness.) OK, maybe humor is misplaced at this time, but inappropriate humor has been my trademark for many years and it’s too late to change now.
Humor is not misplaced here today. I need it. And, considering that I posted this same thing on Fet, I’m expecting Master to slap me in the back of the head for letting everyone there know that he cried..lol
Thank you.
Shit, Dan cried harder than I did when we had our old male cat put down a few years ago. He loved Dan and hung out with him in his office whenever he had to work in there. Dan was a mess when the vet came (yeah, we lucked out, the vet goes past our place on his way home so he did it here), really sobbing hard like I’d never seen him before. He couldn’t stop for several minutes after the vet left and tears still spring up in his eyes to this day whenever we talk about our Biggie-cat.
And yeah, shhhhhh…don’t tell the Ultra Uber Manly-Man Doms/Super Subbie Slavier Than Thous on Fetlife about it; they’ll take Dan’s Dom-y PlayCard away and call him a pussy, right? ;P
Fuck ‘em.
I guess we all have our own story. It is a responsibility we accept, if we are responsible owners, to try our best to care for them better than ourselves on the far end of their life and it sounds as if you have done that. It is not possible to will away pain and misery, nor can medicine cover it til the end without making them sicker. You know when the time is right even if you don’t want to.. My heart goes out to you all. Hold each other tight and prepare your hearts – you will hear him and see him out of the corner of your eye constantly for a while. It’s a little trick of habit or memory that is so hard when you lose them…
I am so sorry this happened…I haven’t been through your exact situation, but I watched my dog die in front of me, trying to get her to the cardiologist for a heart checkup because her murmur was getting worse and she was having some breathing problems, though not severe. She waited for someone to pick her up from the vet clinic to die…the vets said she barked weakly all day long to get out of her cage..and when she saw me, she knew it was okay to go because I would hold her and tell her it was alright. I know what it’s like to lose someone you consider to be a child or family member. I grew up with her and didn’t expect it. I thought she had plenty of time. That she would make it another day. We never know why these things happen…all we can hope for is that our pets know we love them when they go and hope on our end that we will see them again someday. I know your Master is devastated and so are you…I’m glad you both have each other, because there will be a lot of pain and feelings of loss ahead. Just support each other and even though the hurting doesn’t really ever go away, it lessens some. My prayers are with you both and if you ever need to talk, well I know we aren’t even acquaintances, but you can email me.
I’m soooo sorry.
~junebug
I feel for you guys, too. I had to put down my dog a few years ago and I have another one who is growing old too. It’s horrible. But you did the right thing, and it takes strength to go through it. It’s so easy to think “just another week” og “just another day”. And I can very well understand you betrayal of trust-comment – that is actually the worst part for me as well, and I am dreading the day when I have to put down my current dog because of it. The best ting was said earlier, though, that you didn’t betray it but showed that you deserved it.
Best hugs and wishes to you all.
Kaya,
I could sum it all up with a simple, “ditto the above comments.” I’ve lost several pets in numerous ways, but the one that hurt the worst was the one that died while I wasn’t there. Ranger, the best mouser in the world, died of anti-freeze poisoning while I was visiting family for Christmas. That one hits me the hardest because I wasn’t there for him like I should have been (not realistic, but there). You and Scott did the right thing, and the vet did the right thing by letting you be there at the end. I’m sure Sutter is bragging on you and Scott right now to all his canine friends about how perfect his owners are. While the pain nefver fully goes away, it does fade and become bearable, with time.
Dave
sooo many hugs to you, your Master and your kids sweetie- im so very very sorry for your loss. our pets are like our children, they are planted deeply in our hearts surrounded by our love. their love and devotion is always endless.
keeping you all in my thoughts,
Hisflower
I’m so so sorry to read this blog… I’ll chime in with Lisa, you absolutely did confirm Sutter’s trust in you. I know that look, i saw it with my old dog a few times when i was a teenager. She had a couple of strokes, and could no longer hold her pee for very long, and had to be shut in the kitchen if we were out of the house. She hated it, and not because she was confined, She hated it because she knew *why* she was confined, although she was never at the point where she couldn’t get herself out of her pee.
Mom said she knew it was time when she came down one morning to find her huddled behind dad’s comfy chair. I was in my twenties by then, long gone from home, but she took one look at her, saw the suffering and knew it was time. They got her to the vet asap, and like you, were allowed to stay with her while she passed. So yes, you did absolutely the right thing in recognising that Sutter was suffering beyond what he could deal with, and that it was time to be unselfish, and let him go. I know i’m absolutely dreading the time when we’re going to lose Jess, whenever that is.
in time, the memories and heartache will ease and you’ll remember Sutter with love and affection – as i remember Shandy now. Its a cliche, but time really is a great healer.
*hugggggggggggsssssss*.. from both Master and i..
keth
xx
thought i would just just share this
All pets go to heaven by sylvia browne
I’m Still here
Your heart has been heavy since that day
The day you thought i went away
i havent left you I never would
you just cant see me though i wish that you could
it might ease the pain that you feel in your heart
try and think of it this way it might help you see
that i am right here with you and always will be
remember the times we were out in the yard.
you could always not see me yet i hadnt gone far
thats how it is now when you look for my face
i am still right beside you filling my place
i find it to be very sad
that seeing and believing seem to go hand and hand
the love and the loyalty the warmth that i gave
you felt them did not see them but you believed just the same
i walk with you now like i walked with you then
my pain is gone and i lead once again
my eyes always following you wherever you roam
making sure you are okay and your never alone
our time was short yet for me it goes on
i wont ever leave you i will never be gone
i live in your heart as you live in mine
an enduring love that continues to shine
the day will come and together we will be
and you will say take me home girl and once again i will lead
until that day comes dont think that i have gone
i am here right besides you and my love lives on……
*big hugs* i cried. im so sorry to hear. i hope your handling it alright i would be a mess for days. *hugs*
For many of the rest of us who want to say the right and comforting thing just now ………….
We just don’t have the magic words. We do have the desire for them and want so much to share them. You will continue to be in our thoughts and prayers.
Kaya and Scott, As owners of 6 treasured dogs I understand your pain.
There isnt much I can add to the words others have already expressed, just know that Master and I have you both firmly in our thoughts today and are giving our own family double lovin. May Sutter stay in your hearts always, and over time the pain fade, and the good memories make you smile again.
Jeez, now IM crying.
It’s always a hard decision. We had to put our 3 dogs down within a few years of each other and one was WELL before his time (horrible seizures) so I know what you’re going through. You absolutely did the right thing.
-sends hugs for you both-
Meh. That was me.
i am sitting here all teary eyed and feeling for you both…
i have put down more than my share of “family members” and it never gets easy……. and you always second guess your decision……
Just know he isn’t in anymore pain.. and that IS a good thing
morningstar (owned by Warren)
To B/both of Y/you My wishes go out to Y/you and know that W/we are feeling your pain ( something that only littleone enjoys, LOL ) butt this time it is real pain that one doesn’t wish for.
Sir,
Owner of morningstar
Yep, tearing up over here. I swear, there isn’t much that gets to me more than hearing the heartbreak of people who have to put a good family friend down. You guys totally did the right thing. *hugs to both you and S*
The hardest thing to do in life is to let go of the things that bring us the most joy. You did a good thing.
love and hugs to you and your family.
always, delight.
There is no guilt- yall did what had to be done.
*hugs to you and Scott*
I am so very sorry about both your loss and S’s loss as well.
I do have to say one thing. Sometimes it is the only option. And doing anything else during those times is nothing but selfish, in my opinion. You both were not selfish. You knew that he was suffering and you did not want him to suffer any longer. He’s not in pain any more, he’s not confused about why he can’t do things he used to be able to do anymore, and he’s somewhere right now chasing a ball and looking down on both of you.
I can feel your hurt. On Feb 11 I lost my best friend too. He was 9, old for a Mastiff. I left for work at 4:30 that morning and when I opened the door he hopped up to go out when I went out. I got a call from my mom at 8 saying she had found him in the yard dead. I wasn’t ready for him to go. It was way too soon. There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t look for him and miss him. Tell your Master I know what he is going through. Just because we are dominant, doesn’t mean we are stone men.
Goliath
Oh my, I also cried reading.
My thoughts are with you both.
xxxx
rosie
I read you every day, and more often than not don’t agree with a word you write. But I needed to let you know how very, very sorry I am for yours and Scott’s loss.
Losing a pet is never easy. Making the decision to put a pet down is even harder. It leaves you feeling guilty and lost … and yet … when the pain fades and you are once again able to look at pictures of Sutter without dissolving into tears, you will feel at peace with your choice. Because then and only then you’ll realize that what you’ve done was done out of love for Sutter. An amazing amount of love.
My thoughts and prayers are with you both. Talk about Sutter. Remember him. It’ll help you heal.
~M
I am sorry. Ya’ll have my prayers.
I can barely see to type…..just put down my 17 yr old dog last fall…it was the right kind thing to do….as was your decision for Sutter…..but, OMG the pain.
Kaye
*hugs* Losing a pet sucks, a lot, but when my dog died we actually were able to bury him with his favorite blanket and it helped some to ease the pain. I don’t know if this is an option for ya’ll, but if not a memorial might be. Sorry for your loss.
Hugs to you both. A memorial is wonderful, if you can, do this for your Master:
http://www.letsrockcarvedstone.com
I got one last summer when I lost my kitty of 16 years, I found this woman on the internet and she will find just the right stone, help with your design, and it was $ well spent. The plus is that you can take it wherever you go.
I read your blog almost every day but have never posted a comment before, but this one got to me. I own several dogs and have had to let more go than I ever wanted. A friend of mine sent me this poem the last time I had to help one of my dogs out of their pain. It helped me tremendously. I hope you and Scott can draw some comfort from it.
The Last Battle
If it should be that I grow frail and weak
And pain should keep me from my sleep,
Then will you do what must be done,
For this — the last battle — can’t be won.
You will be sad I understand,
But don’t let grief then stay your hand,
For on this day, more than the rest,
Your love and friendship must stand the test.
We have had so many happy years,
You wouldn’t want me to suffer so.
When the time comes, please, let me go.
Take me to where to my needs they’ll tend,
Only, stay with me till the end
And hold me firm and speak to me
Until my eyes no longer see.
I know in time you will agree
It is a kindness you do to me.
Although my tail its last has waved,
From pain and suffering I have been saved.
Don’t grieve that it must be you
Who has to decide this thing to do;
We’ve been so close, we two, these years.
Don’t let your heart hold any tears.
We’re so sorry for your loss. It’s very difficult to make that final decision but pets have a way of letting us know when it’s their time. You showed him how much you loved him by doing the right thing and letting him go.
Thinking of you and wishing you both much strength,
T and A
::hugs to you and your Master::
I’m so very sorry for your loss.
My thoughts are with you.
k
kaya –
Losing a pet is one of the most difficult things you ever go through. I remember I cried more when my dog was put to sleep than when my mother died. I’m crying now just thinking about it.
Your dog had a great life – well loved and taken care of. What more can any being deserve? You chose to end his suffering in a humane way. I just wish that when my time comes I have someone who will so agonize over me.
My condolences to your master and to you.
- Don
so so so sorry.
Love to you both…
Hug.
This was beautiful written.
You gave me goosebumps.
i know the pain of losing someone very dear (and pets can be dear to us too)
hug hug hug
I just feel for you both, and I’m so sorry.
The tears are streaming down my face.
I feel for all of you, knowing how hard it is to make that final decision (and to watch it occur right in front of you, wanting to take it back when it’s too late and you can’t).
Big ~hugs~ from Australia xox
you and your Master are in my thoughts *hugs*
I am so sorry. I believe in my heart that they know(our members of our family and our very best friends) we are only trying to do right by them. They give us so much unconditonal love and special times. Thank you for sharing with us. My thoughts are with you.
It’s never easy no matter if it’s five years or twenty-one.
I’ve been with every one of my fur babies when it was time except for one due to being ill. I still feel fucking guilty about not being there to give his floppy ears one more rub.
For now memories will be hard and bring tears, but time will ease the pain and eventually those same memories will bring smiles and laughter.
Hugs to you all.
I had a lump in my throat reading this because I went through it only three years ago and pretty much the sam guilt, she did the whole excited thing as I took her for one last car journey. She now rests in a box that is very precious and sits not far from me in my own space. Warm huggles and wishes to you both xxx
And now I’m crying. I don’t comment often and I know I don’t have anything to say that hasn’t already been said, but I’m so, so sorry. You did the right thing, and in being there for Sutter you helped him AND your Master when they needed you.
Again, I want to express my sincere appreciation for these wonderful words of support. It means so much more than you can ever know.
Master read this last night, and was so touched that he cried all over again. I really think he needed to hear that other people think their pets are that special, too.
Joe’s slut- I love that link you left. I might do that, I think Master would like it. Thank you.
Kaya, my heart goes out to you and yours – it is like losing a child – they become heart of our hearts. I have my Finster and Llyr now, but LIKE children there is NO replacing. Your heart grows bigger and fills with love for another sweet animal, but you know what? At least once a week, something, someone, reminds me of my Lass (2 years ago now) and the tears come trickling down. She was my girl.
ok fine, i cried too. i’ve had to have several pets euthanized over my adult life and it breaks your heart, but you two did the right thing at the right time. dogs are noble creatures, and when yours was unable to have the dignity he had throughout his life, you helped him. there is no shame in showing emotion over the loss of an important family member; that’s what he was, rightfully so. the pain is rawest right now, but you will grieve and look back on happy memories and smile. Kaya bless you for staying with Sutter. i feel the same way, i HAVE to stay with them. Moms are funny like that ; )
I just read this and made me cry. My kitty will be 17 in June and I’ve had her longer than my husband, and she is starting to show her age. I hope I don’t have to make that decision, either way I will be lost without her. She is the child I never had.
I am so sorry, and know what a heartbreak it is!
I am so sorry.
I am even more sorry that I wasn’t able to get here to tell you both that…
Go gently through the next bit of time. Losing such a good friend is a serious thing. The hurt will lessen in time but not for awhile.
Know that your grief honors this wondrous beast who loved you so.
Hugs, swan
You’ve a lot on your plate right now so I appreciate that you came by. (and I hear my site is blocked for being too raunchy. tee hee)
It is a very painful and sad thing. I’m truly sorry.
They do go to heaven. They do.
*hugs*
Losing a loved pet is never easy.
My thoughts are with you all in your time of grieving
You and your master have my condolences on your loss :( May your dog’s spirit rest in peace.
It definitely isn’t easy loosing a pet. Pets are like family members to people. Hell, I would cry if I lost my pet snake.
I had trouble being there for my cat Katie when she was put down nine years ago. She had a tumor. I was devestated, but I thought it was the best thing to do for her. While I felt guilty about putting her down, two weeks later I felt better about the decision because death took away her pain and suffering. I believe she’s happy now in the afterlife for kitties.
this made me cry :(
last june, the day before daddy and i got on a plane to get married, we had to say goodbye to his dog of 9 years. longer than he’s had me, too. buddy had cancer and was still having good days regularly, but the cancer was aggressive, and the vet was sure he wouldn’t last the 2 weeks we’d have to kennel him while we were gone. at the vet’s urging, and knowing that buddy was in pain (and because he was eating baby food because he couldn’t eat dog food any more), we knew it was time.
it was the worst thing ever, having to make that decision for a member of our family like that. then we realised the loss all over again, 2 weeks later, when we returned home to an empty house.
i’m so very sorry for your loss.
I very much appreciate your words, all of you. Thank you so much.
Delurking to tell you about a book I read recently that might give you a new perspective on Sutter. It’s called “The Art of Racing in the Rain” by Garth Stein. The novel is a profoundly touching portrait of the animals in our lives and the relationships we have with them and it’s told from the dog’s point of view.
I hope when I’m in Sutter’s shape, someone will be watching over me to say “it’s time” with the same love and commitment you both had for him.
My condolences. You did the right thing. My Smokey, my 18 year old cat was still purring, still sitting with me anytime I was sitting, still bright-eyed and happy. I was hand feeding her the last week. The day she took the food and it dropped out of her mouth was it. She was still aware, still happy, purred on the vet’s table right before the relaxation injection before the last injection. But it was time and you know it was Sutter’s time for his own quality of life. The time never feels right to us humans.
Read The Rainbow Bridge. It’s good reading for a time like this. Just google it.
I am so sorry for your loss, 2 months ago I had to put down my dog. It was and continues to be hard to have him gone. I still walk into my room expecting him to be laying on the bed.
You made the right choice. The choice to save him from pain, the choice to be kind and honorable. He will be there waiting for you and Your Master when you are welcomed home just as he welcomed you home on this part of your journey.
It was the right thing to do. We had to put down a great dane when I was about 14 and I grew up that puppy. I couldn’t be in the vet when they put him down. Like your Master, I didn’t want that to be my last memory. I stayed in the vets office for as long as I could to be with him… but when she came in with that needle… I Was gone. When dad came out I broke down and the tears never stopped. He was a good ol pup. Dad says that they waited to long for him too, got to the point to where he couldn’t hold it long enough to get outside. He wanted out, but as he was going to the door he was also peeing on the way… He too that embarrased look, ears were down tail between his legs.
A few years ago mom and dad had to put another dane down. He was getting to the point to where his hips would just randomly give out on him. He’d fall and dad would have to go help him stand back up. I don’t know what else was up with him, dad recently told me that he had cancer as well.
I think about those dogs all the time. Mostly the first one because he was my child hood dog. LOL He would even chase the neighborhood kids off me. All I would have to was climb the fence to our back yard and he’d act all tuff and scare em off. I Was picked on as a kid, so he protected me from the bullies. =)