I AM SO EXHAUSTED! lol
I forgot (or, as Babygirl would say, “I mergot”) how energetic and attention consuming the wee ones are. Version 2.0 isn’t sleeping through the night yet so it’s easy to see why Jes is so. freaking. tired. Babygirl is a whirlwind of activity, from the minute her feet hit the floor in the morning until she’s tucked into bed, reluctantly and 18 excuses for being hungry, thirsty, gotta-pee, I’m hot/I’m cold, “you mergot another kiss!” later, she is a busy BUSY little girl.
We’ve read books until my voice cracked and my eyes bled. We’ve baked cookies and made mini-donuts (her favorite activity, by far). She’s helped me do dishes, sweep, dust and vacuum. We’ve put together 800 million puzzles. We’ve done laundry. We’ve played house, restaurant, farm, and grocery store. We played in the snow, had snow ball fights, climbed snow mountain, and made snow angels– until the frigid, below zero temps settled in and then we made carpet angels. We’ve been to the children’s museum. We’ve been to the thrift store and cleared out their My Little Pony toy selection (wherein I was educated on what cutie marks are). We watched Finding Nemo and ate popcorn and discussed sea turtles. We’ve done play-doh, stickers, cut-n-paste activities, and she showed me how to take care of pets on her Leappad. We ate ice cream for breakfast because mom won’t let her do that at home. ~beams~
She’s been here 5 days. O.O
I’ve inhaled intoxicating amounts of baby scent. I’ve rocked, bounced, sang, and peek-a-boo’ed. I’ve kissed tiny little toes and fat, chubby cheeks. I’ve gotten great big toothless slobbery grins, excited squeals, and infectious baby giggles. Version 2.0 is not at all interested in entertaining herself, she’d much rather be held, tyvm. All the swings, bouncers and bumbos in the world can take a flying leap when there are people around. She’s quite vocal with her displeasure at being put down- not crying so much as telling you off, until, that is, she sees you walk by and you don’t pick her up and then her little heart just breaks in two at the rejection.
She has the *cutest* little lower lip pout.
She loves loves loves her big sister and just grins ear to ear whenever she sees her. Babygirl doesn’t quite return the sentiment and is less enamored with the attention-stealing, loud-mouthed infant. She’s informed me that she wants Version 2.0 “to go back to being an egg”.
Jes and I have talked. About cooking (she made me dinner last night!), about budgeting, about love and marriage and relationships. About sex. About child-rearing. About the past, about her progress, about her success. We’ve talked like adults, woman to woman.
Jes is AMAZING with both of the girls. She’s far surpassed my expectations. She was a teen mom and she floundered, there is no denying that- not even she denies it. She regrets it, she feels bad about what she missed of Babygirl’s beginning, but there’s no turning back time and no point in beating herself up over it now. The only way to rectify past mistakes is to move forward positively, and she is. She’s making up for it in the only way she can. She’s grateful to us for being supportive and for having faith, for not swooping in and taking custody when we all know we could have. She’s grateful we gave her room to grow up and mature. She’s older now (21! Ack! I feel so old!), married, she’s a good mom. They’re creating a home for their family. I don’t know how much better of an outcome I could have hoped for.
I’m sure it’s not all sunshine and roses and who knows what will happen in the future, but for now, right now, things are good for her. And I appreciate that. A lot.
I appreciate this opportunity to be a grandma and not some confusing grandma/mom combination. I get to have ice cream for breakfast because it’s only once and it’s fun. I get to blow money on 15 unnecessary My Little Ponies to the absolute delight of the pony obsessed 3 yr old because I don’t have to budget diapers or formula. I can take over a night or 2 of baby care so mommy can get a break without feeling overwhelmed.
This is good. Everything is good. I’ve got just about 8 more days with them and I plan on savoring every last exhausting second of it.