Nosy Pokers.

Show us what was in the box, kaya, you said.

Let us see what else was in the box, kaya, you said.

Post pictures of it, kaya! you said.

You know I had Master convinced there was nothing else in that box, right? I mean, whose side are all y’all on anyway??

I feel so betrayed.

It’s cute, though, isn’t it?

Like, it should totally be hanging on the wall in my kitchen, looking all pretty and winter-festive. It absolutely should NOT be delegated to the toybox.

That’s my take on it anyway.

There’s a play party coming up, in about 2 weeks. The day after Master’s birthday actually.

He’s going to be 43.

Of course, my birthday was just a bit ago. I turned 39.

43+39=82

82 because I always get his and I haven’t gotten mine yet.

It seems somewhat of an unfair practice amongst the fuckers we hang with a tradition to let whoever wants to join in give birthday spankings to the birthday girl/boy.

So 82 multiplied by x amount of fucker… erm, x amount of people equals more spankings than I’ve had in probably a year.

I’m understandably reluctant to allow this to happen.

And by “reluctant” I mean “how can I fake my death in the next two weeks”.

And by “allow this to happen” I mean “I’m going to give Master the stink eye when he orders me to bend over”. (Because really, that’s all I have in my arsenal of resistance).

I am in a major pain-avoidance funk lately. It’s weird because when I see him playing with someone else I get all “aww! I wanna be up there doing that!” and then when I get up there to do that I’m all “This shit hurts. I can be done nao plz?”

So since some of you folks that will be at the party are reading this right now, just let me warn you of this- if you get in the birthday spanking conga line:

1. I kick. I’m just sayin’

2. I know where you live. Well, some of you.

3. One whack? One. Single. Whack. and you can consider yourselves stricken from my christmas card list.

And that’s all I’ve got to say about THAT.

(Am I sufficiently scary?)

Hey! Anyone wanna volunteer to be my sister in submission and be the painslut/anal-sex-receiver of the operation? Srsly! You do that shit, I’ll cook and clean and it’ll be FUN!

Anyone?

Buehler?

Call me!

Like

Unlike