“We are torn between a craving to know and the despair of having known.”
The night before last, I was really, really horny. We’ve been fucking like bunnies (still “making up” you know. 
) and the more sex I have, the more sex I want. Master was plum-tuckered out, already lying in bed with his eyelids all droopy, looking all kinds of sexy and pouty, naked and yummy.
I stripped and lay down next to him, placing his hand on top of my freshly shaved-smooth, warm, wet pussy. He grinned sleepily at me. Encouraged, I began to stroke his cock, coaxing it awake. Though his cock responded, stiffening and lengthening in my hand and seemingly ready to fuck, Master claimed the rest of his body was just too tired.
But he was still smiling at me, still giving me reason to hope, so I hopped up onto all fours, my face at his feet, and wagged my ass at him. This may come as a shock but it’s difficult for me to be that blatantly slutty and desperate to fuck. I tend to let him make the first move and not push for getting it if he isn’t raring to go. But he’s mentioned that he’d like me to take the initiative more, to act more like a slut.
So I did, and though he took that opportunity to spank the bloody hell out of my upturned ass (hand spankings just plain hurt, that’s all there is to it), he didn’t hop up to fuck me. That’s a hard one for the bottoms (I think anyway). Just how far is too far to ask for, or entice, him into fucking. It starts to feel too pushy in a big, fat hurry. I think had I continued trying to arouse him, he’d have fucked me upside down and sideways, no matter how tired he was. But I stopped and curled up next to him, where he was asleep in about 20 seconds flat.
But then yesterday, when he got home from work, he was barely in the door, I hadn’t even said hello to him, and he had his cock pulled out of his jeans and was shoving it into my mouth. “I’ve had that picture of you on your hands and knees, waving that ass around, in my head all damn day, cunt. I’m gonna tear your shit up.”
He did too. Fucked me like a two-dollar whore. On my knees, face on the mattress, one of his feet planted against my cheek, pinning my head down. He’d put the nasty black clamps on my nipples, and he yanked back on the chain of the clamps, holding it against my leg so that I had no choice but to stay curled back, trying to keep my nipples as close to my knees as possible lest they be shredded. He took me hard, used me, and fuckin’ hell did it feel good.
It was less than an hour later that he pushed me under the desk and took me again. It was all I could do to keep my head out of the wall and my face from getting carpet burn as he pummeled me from behind. Above my head I could hear the muffled sound of other girls moans through the computer speakers as he browsed his porn collection. I’ve long since stopped getting my feelings hurt when he uses me as his silent, invisible fucktoy while he gets off on watching those size 2 blonde bombshells getting fucked on the screen. In fact these days, I get off on it. I get off on being treated as such and I enjoy hearing the noises, the slaps and smacks, the grunts and groans of other peoples actions, while I’m required to be so passively still, a living, breathing blow up doll.
I’m still horny as all fuck, but now on top of horny is a big ol’ craving for tears and pain, blood and agony. Wanting to get to the place. You know the one. The one that disturbs me as much as it excites me, that pulls me as deeply as it frightens me. Where pain and pleasure are not one and the same, are not working together, it’s all pain all the time, because the pain is the only thing that *gets* you there.
That place. Soon, I hope.
~cunt
Uncategorized | kaya | 
Thursday April 3rd, 2008 12:43pm
That sounds so sexy!
Getting taken the second he walks in the door from work. Knowing that something you did has flooded his brain all day long until it consumed him.
*happy sigh*
You’re a lucky cunt.
That’s exactly what I was about to say!
I am lucky!
Ah, kaya, it is such a shame that you are such a timid little thing. Your Master has to work so hard just to get you interested……lol!!! Nice to hear your excitment again. and I am truely glad that you and your Master worked things out. Prof
Oh yes. Poor, poor Master!
Damn, that sounds good.
Isn’t it rewarding to know that even when he doesn’t take immediately advantage of your body, the images still still float through his mind, tempting and teasing him, getting his aroused until he’s practically going to burst? You have that advantage over the size-2 porn stars every day!
Yes! I was feeling a tiny bit rejected from the night before, but he sure erased those thoughts in a hurry!
i heart two dollar whores
good for you (both)!
xx, m
me too! In a previous life I *had* to have been a hooker.
Ummmm…. YUM!
Thanks!
Yes, but did he give you the 2 bucks?
(What a way to build up a Christmas fund.)
sparkle
LOL No he didn’t! Cheapskate.
After reading about your escapades I can’t wait for my Daddy to get home!!!!
Did ya get some??
god i love this blog.
Love yours too.
Kaya,
May your fearful craving be fulfilled soon. Enjoy the agony.
Dave
I sure hope so, Dave.
Yum! Goodness!
Except, I can’t quite picture how he planted his foot on your cheek and still managed to fuck you. But it sounds hot, hot, hot!
thank you for sharing
lee
Picture doggy-style fucking, with his one leg kind of over my shoulder and on my face. I’ve looked all over trying to find a porn picture and can’t find one, even though I’ve seen them a million times.
Hand spankings.
Some men have nice hands. They put you over their knee and wallop away and it stings a bit and warms your ass and hurts in a way that has you squirming and trying to rub your pussy against their leg, desperate to get off.
And some men have mean hands. And they whack you and you just start to pray they’ll pull out something ELSE to smack you with or stop smacking you at all or… ARGH!
It’s not a matter of how hard they smack. Not a matter of sadistic intent or levels of sadism.
It’s just…
Mean vs nice hands.
Taylor and the S Man both have mean hands.
Mean. Devil. Hands.
God given, of course.
They really do. You’re exactly right. I do find myself praying that he’ll use something other than his hands. They’re wicked!
Oh my God. Well, that got my blood pumping… =0D