And I’ve unfriended this person very recently for her attitude and constant snarky comments.

She had been raped herself. However, I’ve been emotionally and verbally abused through bullying. I don’t think anyone that wants to be called names and put through humiliation is crazy or needs help because I had an issue with it. I had an issue with it because I wasn’t consented to being treated like I was a leper of some sort (which I was) like she wasn’t consented to having sex forced upon her. She bitched me out when I made a post listing the differences in rape fantasies and actually rape…claiming she knew the difference. Well, from her judgemental attitude, it didn’t seem she didn’t.

Reading further down the page, I’d also like to touch on the whole rape fantasy thing – I DEFINITELY understand that one!

I was raped at 16, by a total stranger, on my way home from a friend’s house. It took years of agony and nightmares and therapy and tears to get over it. And I still get wet at the thought of being “taken”. I can still masturbate to the idea of someone I love doing exactly the same things to me that my rapist did. In many ways, I personally think that’s healthier than dwelling on the trauma and the violation and the invasion. My rapist tried to take a valuable part of me away, and I took it back – at what point does that make me sick?

Thank you for sharing your experiences. And thank you for reaffirming my thoughts. :D

I’m not in any way trying to “sound” knowledgeable, that is you reading something into what isn’t there – I am the LAST person to think they’re the expert on anything.

Don’t worry – you’ve made it perfectly clear you’re not interseted in ANY comment (on your public blog) that might in any way disagree with your own – I’ll stay away.

And I like it this way. So what’s your point?

And you do understand that someone, somewhere, is going to find your style of “harsh anal sex” to be “abusive” as well, right? Do you care though? Any more than I care that you find our style to be abusive? Didn’t think so.

I think what bothers me – really bothers me, is the wiping of the blood two days later-

It was a simple tear, ffs. I wasn’t leaving blood clots in the toilet. I’m talking about a smear on the toilet paper. I get the same tears from a big poop. Holy Jesus, y’all are alarmists.

MASSIVE long-term damage can be done to a body and I’ve read and seen it happen … so that down the line, the “Master” has to get someone else … becuase he has damaged his original “property” so mcuh she can no longer physically handle anything

But massive damage wasn’t done so your point is moot. And maybe.. just maybe.. my Master knows enough about what He’s doing that He CAN make it hurt and still not permanently damage me. He’s pretty skilled and He loves me a whole bunch so I’m not worried.

For me, that spills over into outright ABUSE

Good thing it’s my life and not yours then, huh?

plain and simple wife abuse – using the pretence of dominance as an excuse

Congrats for repeating what every single narrow-minded vanilla person says about BDSM. Welcome to their club.

Bottom line for me is that permanent damage NEVER is justified –

Permanent damage wasn’t done. What is damaging and harmful to you, for your mind and your body, is not even close to being damaging for me.

and this smacks to me of something far beyond harsh treatment.

You “smack” to me of judgmental attitude, of “one-true-wayism” and of “my kink is great but yours is sick” thinking. I have no use for that shit, truly. How dare you come here and try and belittle me for my fetishes and our preferences. Shame on you.

One woman’s abuse is another woman’s pleasure. I know you’re trying real hard to sound knowledgable or “in the know” while the rest of us peons are apparently too ignorant to know what “damage” we *might* be doing in our play (because only YOU know the real truth, right?) but step down off your high horse for a sec and consider that the rest of us are equally as informed and aware as you are.

Your style of “submission” would bore me to tears, I’m sure. As such, I don’t read you or follow you or try and communicate with you. I’m sure you do not care what I think about your life and since my style of submission offends you so much, I’d ask you to offer me the same courtesy. I’m honestly not the least bit interested in your opinion on my lifestyle.

I think what bothers me – really bothers me, is the wiping of the blood two days later- MASSIVE long-term damage can be done to a body and I’ve read and seen it happen … so that down the line, the “Master” has to get someone else … becuase he has damaged his original “property” so mcuh she can no longer physically handle anything; one that stays with me is the woman who was spanked so harshly and so cruelly that her skin deteriorated to the point where she could no longer handle even the lightest tap without the skin splitting open.

For me, that spills over into outright ABUSE – yup, plain and simple wife abuse – using the pretence of dominance as an excuse – unfortunatley, I figure there is a good percentage of relationships out there that masquerade as D/s or M/s and are just plain old fashioned abuse – but that’s just my opinion.

Bottom line for me is that permanent damage NEVER is justified – and this smacks to me of something far beyond harsh treatment.